Tuesday, June 2, 2009

PMS and the band

About a week before my period I get swollen and my band gets tight. I have noticed it in the past, but since the weather has gotten warmer it seems to be worse. I have horrible and painful gas, and yesterday I was stricken with some serious acid reflux. Last night I woke up constantly coughing and choking on acid. It was miserable. I called the doctor this morning, and since I'm able to eat and drink without any problems (except for the reflux) they don't suspect a problem. I'm still losing weight, and everything feels fine otherwise, but PMS is not a good time for me. I cannot go in monthly to have this thing loosened, and the doctor called me in some Nexium for the reflux.

I guess I just feel really full because of the gas. I get hungry and I'll eat some and then I'm full. I'm hoping that the Nexium can give me some relief because this is pretty bad. I've been getting on all fours on the floor and letting my kids pat me on the back and burp me. I sound like a Harley down there, and yesterday I spit up. I told my son this was payback for all the spitting up he did as a baby. :b

Here's to hoping Nexium does the trick!

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

I DID IT!

When I thought that my scale was wrong, I was wrong.Which sucked. When I went to the doctor my old scale was right and I was in a losing slump. But when I got my last fill the weight started falling off like crazy. That being said...

When I started this whole thing, I had set my first goal. It wasn't to weigh 150lbs. I just wanted to be under a certain number by Jack's 6th birthday. His birthday is tomorrow and I am .5 pound under that number. So I'm curious to see how much I weigh in the morning. I had a wee ball game tonight and that's a work out on it's own, I was all over the place this weekend and it's paying off.

This is huge for me, because I have NEVER in my life met a weight loss goal. EVER. In the past I would have gained 10lbs rather than lose it. I feel like I can do anything right now.

Yesterday was Memorial Day, and I made a brisket and some apple dumplings and brownies. I love to cook, bake, etc. But I never really get to much anymore so when a holiday comes around I go hog wild. My brisket was so moist that it nearly melted in my mouth. I had a bite of the apple dumpling but it was so rich I couldn't eat more. I skipped the brownies. Which is bizarre for me.

I had a teaspoon of potato salad, a teaspoon of pasta salad, and I had a slice of brisket. Maybe an oz? Maybe less. I just know I wasn't able to sit still!

So I survived a holiday, I met my first goal, and I am feeling like a million bucks!

Saturday, May 23, 2009

Activity

I have found that I really want to be active right now. And by active I mean I want to play! I want to play baseball, run with the kids, play tag, just anything that has me out in the sun and moving. This isn't really my thing, I'm more of a sleeper by nature, but since the weight has started to really come off, I want to be doing something to the point that I fall into bed at night exhausted from the days activities. This is getting to be one of my very favorite things about losing weight, because my kids are loving it. They think it's cool that their mom wants to play like a kid with them. This was one of the reasons that I wanted to have the surgery, so that I can build memories with them, and I can do things with them. Exercise is absolutely essential to losing the weight, because the more active I am, the more it comes off. It's insane how fast I can lose when I do some sort of exercise.

I went to Jack's kindergarten graduation last week, and it was very apparent that I have lost weight. I was able to wear some pants that are two sizes smaller than what I wore last summer. I took pictures and I can see the weight loss so much in my face. I just keep looking at one picture in particular and focusing on how much healthier I look. And happier!

I set a goal for Jack's birthday. I wanted to be at a certain weight by his birthday and I am about a pound away from that goal. His birthday is next Wed. If I can make that goal then I have no doubt that I can reach my next goal!

Friday, May 15, 2009

Undergarments

I'm having some undergarment issues over here. I might need to invest in a 5 pack of Hanes Her Way's and quite frankly, a couple of smaller bras. My underwear hangs off of me like a dirty diaper. It twists up when I'm sleeping, if I suck in my tummy it falls down a little bit. I noticed yesterday that while my cup size is fine, my bra's do not come near fitting me. It's bizarre.

I'm so happy! Last night my pants were so huge on me that I had to keep pulling them up. It's like one day you wake up and suddenly you are being swallowed whole by your own clothing. I have some smaller things hidden in my closet that I'm considering pulling out tonight and seeing what happens. I've almost been afraid up to this point. I'm not ready to buy anything new at this point, simply because it's summer and I intend to spend the summer in tank tops and shorts and flip flops. And my bathing suit.

But yeah, I need to get some new things to cover my undercarriage today. I'm not ready to go to VS, but the 5 pack at Walmart will do just fine. And if I'm lucky, I might be able to get a bonus pair in there.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

A Year Ago

Last year on PTO fun day, I caught that glimpse of myself in the window. That was the day that my life changed.

Friday was PTO fun day, and I caught a glimpse of myself in the window. I nearly cried. I saw some pictures and I nearly cried. I realize I have a long way to go, but for the first time in my life, I can look back on a year ago and say that I DID do something about it. And I'm NOT the same person I was back then.

So many times in my life I've thought to myself "if I had stuck it out, I would have lost 50 lbs by now". This time I did it! I cannot begin to explain how amazing it feels to have followed through. That day I was also able to keep up with my kids, I had energy and stamina and I wasn't ashamed to be in front of a group of people teaching kids to play tee ball. I was able to stand up there in front of them, with confidence and faith in myself. I may not be thin yet, but I'm a hell of a lot closer today than I was a year ago.

Could I have done it alone and without my band? Maybe. But that's not the route I chose. I'm healthy, I'm happy, and I'm losing weight at a steady, healthy pace. Yeah there have been some hard times, but none so hard that I can even remember them specifically. But I can remember feeling embarassed and ashamed as clear as if it were yesterday. So I cannot even fathom what next years PTO fun day will be like for me. I may go in a bikini. My biggest worry may be a total and complete lack of a tan. I'm ok with that.

Ooooh gas

Last Sunday I woke up feeling really full and bloated. I felt like I had just finished a huge Thanksgiving meal. I was miserable. I tried to have some breakfast and I couldn't get past a bite, and when I did eat it hurt like hell. I took some Gas-x because I was able to drink water, I wasn't nauseated or throwing up, just really full feeling.

I went to lunch on Monday with my mom and we went to a mexican restaurant. I had the insides of a chicken enchilada, the chicken is really moist and the pieces are small, and keeps me full. I also have rice with it. I can eat rice, some can't but I can. I took a bite and my stomach cramped like a beast. I didn't eat the rest of the day. I called my doctor on Tuesday because I was concerned, but they said to take Gas-X and stay on warm soup or liquids a couple of days to see if it passed. It got better, but not great.

On Friday I spent the day at my sons school, running the halls and then my daughter had tee ball practice that night. I was running, jumping, squatting, all the things I wouldn't have even considered doing a year ago. Have I mentioned that I LOVE this stinking band? Anyway, that night I went to my Nanas for dinner and they had those giant sub sandwiches. I took the insides out of a slice of the turkey and provolone sandwich and had that with some peeled grapes and banana slices. I did not have so much as a cramp. So I need to stay active!

I never really had gas up until last week. And I have to say that I felt so stinking good Friday night after all that activity that it has just encouraged my desire to get as much exercise in as possible. Swimming season is around the corner and with tee ball starting I'll have at least 2 good workout days a week and I can just walk the other days.

But...the interesting thing is...when I had my adjustment 2 weeks ago I got to the perfect spot. 10 days later I had dropped 8lbs. When this gas started up, I stalled. When I woke up on Saturday I had lost 2lbs. I have to eat or I simply do not lose weight. And I eat the protein first, then I have the veggies or fruit. I know that they say that and everyone knows it but it's so tempting to have the soft stuff first. I made my family pasta last week and I had the sauce with some ricotta cheese. It was really good. I made tacos last night and I had refried beans, with some cheese and guacamole. I didn't need the shell, it was good and beans are a wonderful source of protein. I used fat free beans and low fat cheese. But I went full Monty on the guac. It's how I roll.

My mother in law wanted to go to breakfast today. I told them that eating out was not really my bag, especially in the morning. So he took her and they had a nice time alone while I stayed here with my rugrats. Eating out use to be really fun. I use to love to go and talk and have fun, but now I would rather do something else. I can't think of what, but something that doesn't involve food. I'll go with my mom, or a friend, but it's mostly for the company. I always ask for a to go box as soon as the food gets there. Because before I have even begun everyone else is almost finished. My sister says I make her feel like a pig, I don't mean to but I cannot eat fast! The consequences are not just unhealthy but they HURT!

So, I'm happy to report that I am gassy no more. Or at least not as gassy. I've decided that gas is going to be an issue, but it will keep me active because I know that if I'm not, I'm going to hurt. And I really don't like to hurt!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

So This Is the Sweet Spot

I'm there. It's perfect. I don't get stuck, I don't choke, I don't slime, I don't PB (I didn't really do those things anyway, but I don't feel like I will). I can totally tell the difference between being full and being stuck.

I went to my doctor on Wed. and he gave me a tiny fill. Then he told me to focus on carbs, so I'm focusing on carbs. Since Wed I've lost 6lbs. I eat something every 3-4 hours and I don't go without eating. Yeah my meals take me a long time to eat, and it's usually cold halfway through, but who cares? If it becomes a problem I have a microwave. This is what I have been waiting for!

Don't ask me how much is in my band or how much my band holds, because I cannot remember to save my life. I never remember to ask, maybe because my doctor is a hottie and I'm so focused on making him giggle that I can't remember what I'm doing. That and I'm desperately trying to avoid any burping or God forbid other gas slippage.